Dangerous Sales Messages and Cereal Commercials

I would rather my daughter watch violent movies than the children’s cereal commercials I grew up with.

At least the violent movies are honest about their message.

Do you remember the classic 1980s and 1990s cereal commercials? Cute little cartoon characters with funny little taglines.

“Silly Rabbit, Trix are for kids.”
“They’re always after me Lucky Charms.”

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A good marketing or sales message solves a problem that the audience has. The easiest way to know what problem the audience has is to give them the problem. An effective commercial will create the world in which you need their product.

Think of the infomercial where a person opens their kitchen cabinet and an avalanche of storage containers falls on them. Then they offer you a much more efficient set of storage containers.

Never in my life have I opened a kitchen cabinet and had a thousand containers fall on me, but as I watch the infomercial, I am thinking that maybe I should get their storage solution because they’ve drawn me into a world where such problems happen.

Remember the Fruity Pebbles commercials of the 90s?

Fred and Barney are supposed to be best friends, yet the theme of every single ad is that Barney is trying to steal Fred’s cereal.

What’s the moral lesson of this story? If you have something you like enough, then you keep it all to yourself and never share.

How about Trix?

“Silly Rabbit, Trix are for kids.”

“Silly person whose not like us, you don’t deserve the good things that we have.”

Only the people in the privileged class (kids) deserve the best things (Trix). The conceit of the ad is built on the same philosophical underpinnings as segregation laws.

Now you see why I’d be more comfortable with my daughter watching John Wick than an old cereal commercial.

At least the moral lesson of John Wick is about love and loyalty, not racism and selfishness.

It’s not just cereal commercials

World building is a powerful part of any sales or marketing message, and it is as dangerous as it is powerful.

Think of the events in the coaching industry, the ones built around giving you knowledge as a way to draw you in to make an offer.

There’s nothing wrong with this format, just like there’s nothing wrong with a TV commercial, but where it becomes problematic is when the world created is not entirely accurate.

If you’re attending an event like this, it is likely because you think the host knows something worth learning. So, if they teach you that rapid action is the key to success, and they are successful, you’ll internalize that idea that rapid action is good.

But what if they are only teaching this so that you’ll take rapid action to buy their program.

How about if they teach you that worrying about risk is overrated, and that taking massive risks with limited research is the path to riches?

But they are teaching this because they want you to think less of the risk of buying their program.

Maybe you don’t buy into their program, but you adjust your risk tolerance based on what this expert taught you and you mortgage your house to buy into some risky scheme and lose it all.

The advice wasn’t actually good advice, but was simply advice meant to compel you to a particular self-serving course of action.

Always being in integrity

After 25 years of studying sales, I can sniff out when someone has crafted their lesson to “teach” me what I need to know to make the decision they want me to make.

When this happens, I learn that I cannot trust a single word out of their mouth. If they are always selling and always closing, then when are they truly teaching?

If their lessons are built around pushing me to buy the next program, can I trust them to ever stop selling if I do buy in?

The way we do one thing is the way we do everything, right?

It’s okay to plant seeds in a sales process, but it’s not okay to turn your event into a jungle of manipulation.

What’s the right way?

The reason that people sell this way is that it works. They get you in for three days, live or online, draw you into their world, and after all that time, your reality is shifted enough that you’re ready to make decisions you wouldn’t other.

Unfortunately, if you don’t end up buying, then you leave with your reality warped, not shifted.

The better way is to approach the situation with the primary desire to serve, teach, and support.

The better way is to go into your event with the primary intention that every, single person who has trusted you with their time (and possibly money) will leave that event better for having met you whether or not they buy anything.

The better way is to share the best of what you know and who you are and trust that the right people will be attracted to work with you.

Niching the Right Way to Serve the Right People

In the summer of 2015, I found myself in the Emergency Room. My sciatica was so bad that I could not walk and could barely move.

I went to chiropractors, and they could do nothing. A physical therapist was able to get it from debilitating to manageable, but certainly not able to fix it.

As it turned out a combination of short hamstrings and tendons combined with weak core strength (the result of too much sitting and not enough exercise) led to the symptoms. 

The PT gave me a very effective set of exercises to get me from non-functional to functional.

And not a step beyond that.

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Back From California With A Powerful New Community for Entrepreneurs

I am back from California, and this trip will go down as one of those that deliniates a moment of before and after.

What’s that? It’s one of those events where it was sufficiently transformative that there is a distinct difference between the time before and the time after.

Didn’t you come back like two weeks ago?

Yeah. I did, and there has been a lot of catching up to do.

I was out there for JVX, which is the live event that JVIC runs. JVX is three days, but there was a second event run by Michael Neeley and Jay Fiset called Reach that ran immediately after.

It was an amazing experience to get to see so many people whom I’ve known online for so long.

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Networking Asks like a NINJA

Networking is about giving, but part of that is help others to give to you. That is what the networking ask is all about.

In this article, I discussed the 5 levels of NINJA Networking. Now, let’s look at how these five levels respond to the question “Whom can I introduce you to?”

“Give without expectation. Receive without resistance.” This is one of the axioms I follow in life and business. A good networker wants to help those that they meet, so they will ask how they can help. Your answer is crucial to allowing them to give to you.

All five of these levels may apply to any networker. Even the karate master may still employ the simple straight punch he learned in his first day of training. The point is to expand your mindset and range of thinking as you move to higher levels of NINJA Networking.

To get some example responses, I’m going to share how a lead generation guy might answer the question at the five different levels.

Summary of Five Levels of Networking Asks

Level 1: Networking – Prospecting in the Room
“I’m just looking to get out and meet anyone I can. How are you generating leads for your business?”

Level 2: Introduction – Prospecting through the Room
I’m looking to meet entrepreneurs who need more leads for their business.”

Level 3: Non-Competitive Partners – Growing Your Network
“I’m looking to meet people who have audiences of entrepreneurs who need more leads.”

Level 4: Joint Ventures – Collaboration
“I’m looking for opportunities to partner such as summit stages, podcasts, and other lead gen folks I can do a joint webinar with.”

Level 5: Affiliates – Systematized Partnership
“I’m looking for people with an audience of entrepreneurs for webinar swaps, to promote my launch, and whose launch I can promote.”

Level 1: Networking – Prospecting in the Room

“I’m just looking to get out and meet anyone I can. How are you generating leads for your business?”

At Level 1, a networker is looking for prospects among the people they are speaking to directly. They may not actually have a clear idea of who their avatar is, or they don’t know how to ask for it.

There is nothing wrong with doing this as long as it does not come across as pushy or salesy.

I call this network prospecting, and I made great use of it back when I published local magazines. 75% of my business came from this kind of prospecting.

This can be very effective for networkers who do not know how to ask for introductions, and it is also an excellent strategy for someone who finds themselves in a room with inexperienced networkers who do not know how to give introductions.

It is very difficult to reciprocate at this level. They may ask you what you do, but they are simply comparing it to their own needs. It is unlikely they need to buy what you are selling, and that would be the end of it at this level.

The limitation of this strategy is that if you are focused on the immediate sale, then you will not get invited to the higher impact networking communities. This kind of thing is not done in my exclusive TEN Group that I run for elite networkers, and I would not invite someone who approached me this way to that group.

The danger is that you don’t know what you don’t know. If you approached me at level 1, we’d have a pleasant conversation. I might even become a client, but I wouldn’t event mention the TEN Group. You might think it was a highly successful encounter because you didn’t realize the opportunity you missed.

The great thing about this level is that it’s really easy to measure quantitatively. You can track what leads came from what events, and double down in those communities. The tradeoff is that you don’t know what you are missing out on in terms of building your network through the people you are meeting.

Level 2: Introduction – Prospecting through the Room

“I’m looking to meet entrepreneurs who need more leads for their business.”

At this level, we’re not trying to sell the person in front of us. We are seeking to connect with their network.

This is the level that most groups like BNI, AmSpirit, and Success Champions Network operate at. You are aiming to sell through the room rather than to the room. This works because the people in the room are non-competitive partners with whom you are building a relationship.

BNI has a concept of The Referral Confidence Curve. It describes the way that you grow in trust and credibility with your networking partners as you build your relationship.

At this level, it is important to understand who your ideal customer is so that you can educate your networking partners on how they can help you.

This tends to work better in structured networking groups than open networking groups. If I meet you for the first time at a networking event, and you’re asking me to refer clients to you, it is unlikely I’ll do so. I don’t know you. I don’t trust you. And as a super connector, I know a dozen other people who do what you do whom I know better.

This works fantastically well in those structured groups because you do get to know people over time.

This level of networking is also quite quantitatively trackable. The introductions go directly to prospects. You can track how many introductions you get to good prospects and which of those become sales. BNI has a very robust tracking system to determine the value of membership.

Like Level 1, however, you are still not gaining access to the real font of value that is your network’s network.

Level 3: Non-Competitive Partners – Growing Your Network

“I’m looking to meet people who have audiences of entrepreneurs who need more leads.”

This is a most powerful form of networking ask you can make without needing additional infrastructure and capability in your business.

You are no longer asking to meet customers. You are asking for introductions you can build mutually beneficial relationships with.

While it is very difficult to introduce someone I just met to a prospect, I’ll make introductions to non-competitive partners all day long. People aren’t so keen to get an introduction to someone who’s going to sell them, so I’m very cautious about that. People love to meet potential partners, so I can do this much more freely.

This is the level where you can shift from arithmetic growth to geometric growth. At Level 1, each contact is worth less than one. At level 2, each contact may be worth one to two. At this level, one contact can lead to an infinite series of connections as one introductions leads to another ad infinitem.

A Level 3 NINJA Networker can no longer quantitively measure our networking effectiveness. Measurements must now be qualitative.

When I operated at Level 1, I determined that one local Chamber of Commerce generated more sales for me than the others, so I made sure go to their events.

I was operating at Level 3 when I attended a high impact virtual networking event in April of 2021. While I came out of the event with 45 meetings on my calendar, they were not sales calls. They were connections to a higher level of entrepreneur who have given me incredible knowledge, access, and resources. By October, I could still not trace a single dollar of revenue to this event, but as I write this today, a year later, I can credit 80% of my current revenues to connections and concepts that came from that event.

Had I measured it quantitatively, I would have called it a failure, and that would be incorrect.

At Level 3, the value of an event or a connection may come weeks or months later. It may come from an introduction to an introduction to an introduction.

Moving from Level 2 to Level 3 is a mindset shift, and doing so will shift your business and your networking.

Level 4: Joint Ventures – Collaboration

“I’m looking for opportunities to partner such as summit stages, podcasts, and other lead gen folks I can do a joint webinar with.”

Referral partners are good. Joint venture partners are better.

At Level 4, you are shifting your thinking from individual referrals to audiences.

A referral partner is someone who keeps you in mind and refers people to you as the opportunity presents itself. In some cases, such as a Realtor referring clients to a mortgage originator, there is a natural flow of clients. The source of clients is the existing flow of connections that the referring partner has.

A joint venture is about creating a new stream of connections.

There are dozens of ways a joint venture can be created, and you may be participating in joint ventures without realizing it. An interview podcast is a joint venture. Guest provides content. Host provides audience. Guest promotes to their community to grow host’s audience.

Joint webinars, summits, collaborative books, social media joint live broadcasts, guest appearances in a program. These are just a few ways you might joint venture with someone.

Rather than a referral partner introducing you to individual people, you are seeking to connect with audiences. At this level, the introductions you want are not to people you could sell to, or even to people who can refer you people to sell to. You want contacts who can introduce you to entire audiences of dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of people.

Level 5: Affiliates – Systematized Partnership

“I’m looking for people with an audience of entrepreneurs for webinar swaps, to promote my launch, and whose launch I can promote.”

Most joint ventures you encounter are one offs, and each partnership is separately negotiated.

At Level 5, a NINJA Networker has turnkey joint ventures. There’s no negotiated needed because it’s off the shelf.

Some simple examples of this are speaker summits and podcasts. In these, you don’t normally negotiate details. There is some process to get on the summit or podcast. The speaker is told what is expected, and they will either find it acceptable or not participate.

More complex examples of this are launches, workshops, and webinar swaps. These tend to require more infrastructure on the part of the one being promoted, but because of this infrastructure, a promoter can sign up and participate.

For example, if you would like to promote a launch, you sign up. They send you swipe copy, instructions on what to do when, and you do it. Then you get paid for sales you create through your list.

When two Level 5 NINJA Networkers meet, the only complexity is figuring out how to match up marketing calendars. Beyond that, it’s just a matter of “my people will send the materials to your people,” and they’re off to the races.

Five Levels of Networking Asks

Just like the black belt martial artist doesn’t forget the basic strikes and blocks when they achieve the highest level, a NINJA networker will always employ tactics from all levels. Even an entrepreneur with a robust launch process and high converting webinar will still happily someone up if the need shows up in conversation.

The key difference is how you approach people you meet. Are you sizing them up to be a client? Are you seeking a referral partner? Do you want a promotional partner?

How you engage in the conversation will lead to different results and will make different impressions.

Michael Whitehouse is The Guy Who Knows a Guy. He has developed the NINJA Networking framework over more than a decade of networking from the lowest levels to the highest.

Do the five levels of NINJA Networking intrigue you? Get on a call with Michael. Click here to schedule a call.

Five Steps to Learn the Secrets of NINJA Networking

Networking, Introductions, Non-Competitive Partners, Joint Ventures, Affiliates.

Those are the five stages of Ninja Networking mastery, and they just so happen to spell NINJA.

Actually, it’s not a coincidence. Realizing that “networking” and “ninja” started with the same letter, I decided to see if I could make a cool ninja networking acronym. And I did.

Then, I realized that it not only spelled a super cool word, but that it did it in the order that most people follow on this journey.

It was meant to be!

In this article, I’m going to do a quick overview of the five stages, and in future articles I’ll dive deeper into each area. If you find this interesting, and would like to come on a journey with me to learn the secrets of the Ninja Networker, I encourage you to join my Ninja Networking program.

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Katrina Sawa, Jumpstart Your Business – Interview #108

Katrina Sawa is the CEO and Founder of JumpstartYourBizNow.com. She is lovingly known as The JumpStart Your Biz Coach because she kicks her clients into high gear making more money doing what they love and fast. She is the creator of the JumpStart Your Marketing & Sales System, 10x International Best-Selling author with 16 books including, Love Yourself Successful, Jumpstart Your New Business Now and the Jumpstart Your _____(blank) Series.

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Bert Oliva, Make It Happen – Interview #107

Bert Oliva is a Leadership Expert. He is sought after by companies all over the world for his passion, his knowledge and his infectious spirit. He is a Leadership Expert that has transformed lives and helped many to find their human potential.

Bert is an international orator and motivational teacher. He has authored books, developed multiple training programs and coached executives to increase their bottom line. Bert focuses on helping companies and individuals tap into their greatness by teaching them leadership, communication and helping to improve their overall performance.


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Phil Gerbyshak, Speaker, Podcaster, Pinball Wizard – Interview #106

Phil Gerbyshak works with small businesses to use social and virtual selling to increase their profitability, productivity and performance, with speaking, training and coaching programs delivered virtually, in-person and hybrid. He’s written 5 books, and his 6th book, Virtual Selling Essentials, will be available in the first quarter of 2022. When he’s not doing all things sales, he’s a husband, and a bonus dad to two kiddos and two dogs. Please welcome sales speaker, sales podcaster and pinball wizard Phil Gerbyshak to the show.

LinkedIn: Phil Gerbyshak

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Brian Gross, BSG Public Relations – Interview #105

Brian Gross, President of BSG PR, has been in the service of media and public relations for over 28 years. Gross has been employed by companies such as Def American Recordings, Warner Brothers Records, Reprise Records, Elektra Entertainment Group, Vivid Entertainment Group, and such organizations as The Lollapalooza Tour. Brian Gross was an Executive Producer for Reality-X: The Search For Adam & Eve. His background includes all facets of public and media relations, working with some of the largest businesses, celebrities and music acts in the world.


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Jay Fairbrother, The Profit Architects – Interview #103

Jay Fairbrother is a serial entrepreneur, coach and consultant with 30+ years of experience in starting, scaling, buying and selling businesses. He is a licensed Sales Coach and Sales Trainer, as well as a Peer Group Facilitator. Jay is also the Executive VP of Chapters for the Global Leaders Organization (GLO), and his job is to recruit Chairs and start Chapters all over the world.

Jay’s story includes losing everything in the 2010 financial crisis and rising from the ashes.

He has years of experience presenting online, doing webinars to sell products and services and in being interviewed for various publications and media. He knows how to add value to listeners and engage them with stories and anecdotes. Jay also offers affiliate commissions for his products and services.

Jay’s focus now is on helping entrepreneurs profit more… period. Whether through improving sales skills to convert more prospects already in the pipeline, or through making small incremental changes that can have a huge impact on profits, Jay customizes his coaching and consulting with each business owner based on their goals. More growth usually means more headaches. More profits can mean more money in your pocket or more personal freedoms or making the world a better place or selling your business… but none of that happens without Profits.

His WHY derives from reinventing himself and committing to helping other entrepreneurs avoid his failures, mistakes and lessons learned.

His mission over the next decade is to help 100 entrepreneurs to each add six-figures in profits to their businesses.


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